January 11, 2008 one of my first photoshoots ever. It was a ..
Added 2021-01-19 16:53:16 +0000 UTCJanuary 11, 2008 one of my first photoshoots ever. It was a test shoot that I paid for. Yes, the fur coat is real. No, I do not support real fur being used in fashion. I remember not wanting to wear this coat but feeling like I couldn’t say no because I didn’t want to offend the other people on set. This was the age of America’s Next Top Model where it was drilled into you to do exactly as you were told. So I did. I was 18 in this photo wearing nothing but a black thong underneath. I hadn’t ever even had a boyfriend yet and I was topless underneath in front of strangers. But I didn’t want to offend them. I wanted to push myself. I wanted to fit in. I felt sad wearing this fur coat, and I think it’s incredibly noticeable in my face when I look at this photo now. It’s taken me until I hit 32 to realize that I can say no and set boundaries. I don’t always have to pretend to be nice all the time. I can stay true to myself and my tribe will find me. It already has.
